Free to be a Religious Fanatic

I for one am not puzzled by nor concerned for why Americans are so fat. Because I know why it is so. Because we are better and bigger is better. Haven’t you heard. I’ve been to England and Canada and they’re fat too. Just not as fat as us. Because we’re better.

I’ve been to France and they’re not fat at all. No wonder they surrendered so quickly during world war II. That’s why the Japanese lost too. Just too damn skinny and short those little fuckers are. The Germans and the Russian, now those people know how to pack on the pounds need be.

We’re a christian nation. In the bible there’s a clear directive from God to be fruitful and multiply. Damn if that ain’t exactly what we’re doing.

Some folks labor their whole live under the delusion that America is a free nation that was founded on the notion of liberty for all. Granted the idea is force fed to them from a tender age. But very little could be further from the truth.

We are descended from a bunch of puritans who were so devoted to their sick and oppressive religion that they made a perilous, miserable, life threatening, months longs journey across the unforgiving ocean just to be able to worship their psychotic brand of Godliness. These were some devoted mutherfuckers and they were devoted to some fucked up shit.

In fact they were so crazy, that all the other crazy christians of 16th century Europe (who were pretty whacked in their own right) thought those puritan  bitches was totally high.

And that’s what America is all about. Being free to practice fucked and psychotic religions without the other less fucked other psychotic religions being able to stop you.

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